And anyone who's read this blog will know that's not meant as a compliment. This post could ramble on for ages so I'll try to keep it short and to the point.
1. This blog comes courtesy of Google as well as myself, showing that I am still a Google junkie and will require much effort if I am to wean myself off it.
2. Years ago I was evangelistic about Google and would happily have paid an annual fee just for using its magical search engine. I began to drool about Google taking over my life. Just imagine: Google email, a Google calendar, a Google computer, a Google phone !
3. Sure enough, I shifted myself onto Google and for a while all was bliss.
4. Google says "Don't be evil" and is proud of its nerdy, research-led roots. It kept many of its "free" products in "Beta" for so long that Beta became the new Alpha. Meaning, we customers were so happy with our "free lunch" that we didn't care that we were not actually using the shop-ready version. Beta-Gmail seemed to work just fine and we got a kick out being part of the "research team".
5. Except we weren't actually customers or researchers; we were of course just data being sold to advertisers. We were as much the "product" as the piece of cloud-software we were using.
6. I have noted before on this blog how one day I accidentally deleted my entire Google calendar and, later, hundreds of (Google-owned) Youtube videos. There have been other slip-of-the-finger Google deletions but I forget them now. On both occasions I tried desperately (using my journalist hat) to get Google's press office to help but it was like talking to the wall. They played the usual mega-corporation card of "Sorry, it's beyond our control, nothing we can do."
7. I say I tried the press office .. that's because Google has zero interest in customer service, hence no "customer service" office. Google's corporate DNA, starting with the two multibillionaire nerds-in-chief, is, in this respect, shockingly immature. The company talks ivory-tower gibberish about not being "evil" yet here's the real "evil:
8. Having insinuated itself into our lives and made itself "mission critical" (as they say in business), Google thinks it's perfectly ok to limit itself to a "research lab" mentality ... Well, a pretty unusual kind of research lab, which makes squillions of dollars from advertisers while we, the ostensible users, are in fact more akin to lab rats. So it's the worst of all worlds: rampant commercialism combined with cloistered academic arrogance.
9. Recently I was locked out of my Gmail account for the best part of two days. As usual I used Google Search to try to fathom the perverse behaviour of Google. And as usual I found many others in my predicament but all we could do was bitch to each other about it since Google was nowhere to be seen. As usual.
10. Now that would be a good advertising slogan: "Google: Here, There & Nowhere." Or how about: "Google, here for your every need. As long as you don't need us."
11. About a year ago I switched from an iPhone to a Google Nexus 4, which was the only Google-branded smartphone. It was sold heavily on its "pure" Android / Google experience and its first-in-line priority software upgrades.
12. I allowed this phone to become "mission critical", as we all do these days. And in true Google fashion, it repaid this loyalty and trust by eventually causing havoc. Recently I upgraded, as instructed, to the latest operating system ("Kitkat") and then added two further "patches", meaning I am now on version 4.4.2. This exciting advance has made my phone almost unusable, with endless problems, including a ridiculously fast battery drain, constant crashes and a phone signal that is beyond unreliable.
13. You can google "Nexus 4 problems" and read all about it. Including Google's deafening silence, yet again. Perhaps Google has forgotten that unlike many of its services, this phone was not actually free. It may have been much cheaper than other smartphones, but it definitely wasn't free.
14. So I have found myself back in the Apple stores, looking again at the iPhone with its hefty price tag. But imperfect though it is, Apple at least has some conception of customer service. It doesn't try to kid us that we are researchers and then run away when the "research project" blows up in our face.
14. There is much more to be said on this subject but I've already rambled on too long so will leave it here for now.
15. Except to repeat my new suggested slogan: "Google, here for your every need. As long as you don't need us."
1. This blog comes courtesy of Google as well as myself, showing that I am still a Google junkie and will require much effort if I am to wean myself off it.
2. Years ago I was evangelistic about Google and would happily have paid an annual fee just for using its magical search engine. I began to drool about Google taking over my life. Just imagine: Google email, a Google calendar, a Google computer, a Google phone !
3. Sure enough, I shifted myself onto Google and for a while all was bliss.
4. Google says "Don't be evil" and is proud of its nerdy, research-led roots. It kept many of its "free" products in "Beta" for so long that Beta became the new Alpha. Meaning, we customers were so happy with our "free lunch" that we didn't care that we were not actually using the shop-ready version. Beta-Gmail seemed to work just fine and we got a kick out being part of the "research team".
5. Except we weren't actually customers or researchers; we were of course just data being sold to advertisers. We were as much the "product" as the piece of cloud-software we were using.
6. I have noted before on this blog how one day I accidentally deleted my entire Google calendar and, later, hundreds of (Google-owned) Youtube videos. There have been other slip-of-the-finger Google deletions but I forget them now. On both occasions I tried desperately (using my journalist hat) to get Google's press office to help but it was like talking to the wall. They played the usual mega-corporation card of "Sorry, it's beyond our control, nothing we can do."
7. I say I tried the press office .. that's because Google has zero interest in customer service, hence no "customer service" office. Google's corporate DNA, starting with the two multibillionaire nerds-in-chief, is, in this respect, shockingly immature. The company talks ivory-tower gibberish about not being "evil" yet here's the real "evil:
8. Having insinuated itself into our lives and made itself "mission critical" (as they say in business), Google thinks it's perfectly ok to limit itself to a "research lab" mentality ... Well, a pretty unusual kind of research lab, which makes squillions of dollars from advertisers while we, the ostensible users, are in fact more akin to lab rats. So it's the worst of all worlds: rampant commercialism combined with cloistered academic arrogance.
9. Recently I was locked out of my Gmail account for the best part of two days. As usual I used Google Search to try to fathom the perverse behaviour of Google. And as usual I found many others in my predicament but all we could do was bitch to each other about it since Google was nowhere to be seen. As usual.
11. About a year ago I switched from an iPhone to a Google Nexus 4, which was the only Google-branded smartphone. It was sold heavily on its "pure" Android / Google experience and its first-in-line priority software upgrades.
12. I allowed this phone to become "mission critical", as we all do these days. And in true Google fashion, it repaid this loyalty and trust by eventually causing havoc. Recently I upgraded, as instructed, to the latest operating system ("Kitkat") and then added two further "patches", meaning I am now on version 4.4.2. This exciting advance has made my phone almost unusable, with endless problems, including a ridiculously fast battery drain, constant crashes and a phone signal that is beyond unreliable.
13. You can google "Nexus 4 problems" and read all about it. Including Google's deafening silence, yet again. Perhaps Google has forgotten that unlike many of its services, this phone was not actually free. It may have been much cheaper than other smartphones, but it definitely wasn't free.
14. So I have found myself back in the Apple stores, looking again at the iPhone with its hefty price tag. But imperfect though it is, Apple at least has some conception of customer service. It doesn't try to kid us that we are researchers and then run away when the "research project" blows up in our face.
14. There is much more to be said on this subject but I've already rambled on too long so will leave it here for now.
15. Except to repeat my new suggested slogan: "Google, here for your every need. As long as you don't need us."
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